In handling many cases since the beginning of the year in which 50/50 parenting time was an issue and the likely outcome for our clients, it has become apparent that many people want 50/50 parenting time, and after not having it, or after having been in a relationship where both parties are taking care of the children, parents haven't often thought about how to make it work. Who is going to watch the children if they each work 12 hour shifts? Will you have to have day care? If you live in different cities, will you have to take off work early in order to transport the children? Where will the children go to school? These questions in addition to figuring out how to take the children to all of their engagements and activities now on there own. This is often where good support systems such as family support can be very important. It is a very good idea not to just consider that you want to see your kids half the time, but how you can make that happen. In many ways, a 50/50 parenting time schedule includes two single parents each of which have the same obligations singly when they have the children. All the more reason to work together for the best interest of the child to make these issues so much easier on the child, family, and the parents.
One of the issues that is very common is working out care for children, particularly young children, while the parent is working now that the other parent isn't available. Obviously if both parents can work together to provide care when the other works, the family would be in a very good position to tackle a great many obstacles. However, often this is not the situation that we see in divorce cases, at least not at the beginning when emotions are high and parents are quick to place blame upon each other for many perceived shortcomings. Thus, relying on grandparents, or other family members, or making arrangements for child care is ultra important prior to being in court when those questions are being asked about how you can manage your work schedule and handling the children.
Making sure that each parent has the child(ren)'s schedules is important to know where the children have to be and when is important and communication of school functions and work is key to making 50/50 work to make sure they children meet all of their obligations. Having a routine for exchanging the children is important as well to make things smooth for the children. Both parents may want to consider having clothing and essentials at each home for the children unless they want to essentially move the children from home to home.
Many things have to be considered; things that many haven't thought of until the day of court making it hard for the court to determine what's best for the children. Think about all of the things that you now have to do on a full time basis on your own now, and how you will make it work prior to court. Have that discussion with your lawyer, and ask questions about what the best way to accomplish those things (for instance, using that friend you met at the pub yesterday as babysitter may not be a great idea). The lesson to take away at the end of the day is this: You will have to work together with the other parent in order to make 50/50 parenting work. If not, the family and the children will suffer and the arrangement will not work perhaps causing the court to question whether such arrangement continuing is in the best interest of the children. You may not live together, but you'll have children together forever; time to put the children first if you expect to make a 50/50 parenting time schedule work.